Children, particularly in their middle years, thrive on routine. They like knowing what to expect
as their day unfolds (not that they'll always admit this!) or when a holiday approaches. Holidays
offer a unique opportunity to indulge this desire, with traditions they can look forward to year
after year--perhaps taking them off into their adulthoods. Observing traditions expands seasonal
merriment beyond the actual holidays themselves, and provides an outlet for the anticipatory
energy which can threaten to burst the seams of excited youngsters. Some can also offer
valuable lessons in the true meaning of holiday spirit as well.
Here are some unique traditions for your family to try and treasure. Each can be altered to fit into
whichever holiday your family celebrates during the season:
1. Holiday Lights Contest: Take an evening to drive around town to see the holiday displays.
Earlier in the day, ask the kids to make awards from construction paper or colored note cards and
decorate them with stickers, glitter, and markers. On each, have them write something to the
effect of, "We Voted Your House as One of the Best Decorated in Town! Thanks!! --The Smith
Family." Make several of these "prizes" and take them along on the drive. Everyone votes on
the displays deserving of your awards, which can then be placed on or near mailboxes or on the
front doorstep. (A grownup should do this part.) Making the awards and voting the winners is a
fun way to embellish on the light tour many of us take, plus recipients will appreciate the effort.
2. Secret Pals (for a home with multiple children): To increase the holiday spirit of giving, start
a Secret Pal season. Hold this between Thanksgiving and Christmas or New Year's (or a day you
will have time to do the end ceremony described below). Every child old enough to participate
(around 5) has their name placed in a basket. Everyone draws a name, but does not tell anyone
else who they got. They are now that person's "Secret Pal". (If there are an odd number of
children, mom or dad should join in to even things out.)
Each Pal spends the season secretly doing nice things for his/her selected person. This can
include tidying up their things, doing chores for them, leaving them little notes of encouragement
or gifts, and doing their best to be "nice" to each other in their dealings face to face. Encourage
gifts to come from the imagination rather than the wallet.
It can be tough to remain anonymous, but Mom or Dad can lend a hand by helping Pals type
notes or write them so the writing isn't recognized, delivering tokens, etc.
On the last day, hold a Secret Pal ceremony. First, ask everyone to talk about the nice things
his/her Pal did for them. Then it's time to let the cats out of the bag! Don't be surprised if the
kids have so much fun that they ask to do this at other times of the year.
3. Advent Calendar with a Twist: Change the traditional Advent calendar around. Have the
"calendar" start out empty and place a basket next to it with slips of paper with various acts of
kindness and good will written on them. Each day, a slip of paper is drawn and clipped to the
calendar (or, one slip for each child if you prefer); that becomes the dayës holiday assignment.
For instance, one day's slip may prompt the donation of canned goods to charity; another may
ask your child to give someone an unexpected compliment. Continue daily until you have a
month's worth of holiday-inspired good deeds to reflect on. On the Eve of the holiday, review
the slips together and replace each with a small token of good will from Mom and Dad, such as a
coupon good for "One Night Of No Chores" or "Late Bedtime."
4. Treasure Hunt: This alternative to handing out presents works well for any gift-giving
occasion, or can be used in lieu of stocking stuffers. To begin, give each recipient an envelope
containing a clue to the location of a gift hidden ahead of time. They must then find their gift!
The older the child, the harder the clue...though some help may be necessary! Along with the
hidden gift will be another envelope containing a clue to the next gift, and so on. (For Chanukah,
the found envelope remains sealed until the next evening.) For much older children, adults, or to
prolong excitement when there are few gifts to find, have the first clue lead to a second, then
third before the gift is actually found.
Don't be afraid to experiment with ideas for new traditions, and cast away those that aren't
successful. Some may have lost their enjoyment, or involve too much stress to arrange to make it
worthwhile. Replace those with new ones! Some may simply need to be postponed until your
young child is older. Try something new each year; some may become faithful traditions, or at
least a fun experiment for a season. something new each year. Some may become faithful
traditions, while the others provide a neat experience for that season. Either way, such activities
bring families together--the most important tradition of all.
by Lisa Logan